| Denmark's hosts (one of whom was
Krogshøj from Lars Von Trier's "The Kingdom") delivered most of
their chatter in rhyme. It's little touches like that that make one
want to lay waste to whole nations. Capturing the zeitgeist early, Israel gave us a profoundly Mediterranean gentleman doing a Ricky Martin impersonation. Behind him, the obligatory Israeli dancers performing our beloved Israeli choreography, albeit dressed in black rather than white. The verse is nothing much, but the chorus soars adequately and terminates in an amusingly Latin manner. A 'la'-ed section adds to the fun, though it's a good way short of what we know Israel can achieve when they put their minds to it. Making the "Eres tú" plagiarism questionmark of 1973 look like an insignificant comma that was probably just a mark in the paper, Sweden seemingly recycled the chorus from the 1996 Belgian entry, switching the words for something a little more vaguely lesbian to fit with the red-leather image of the performing duo. There's a difference, of course, between theft and innovation. Sweden have added a pounding verse (complete with sequencer) and a decent bridge too. They have, it is reasonable to say, improved upon the Belgian original. Or perhaps it is just some accidental musical Venn diagram. Perhaps inspired by Brainstorm last year, Russia gave us the appropriately named Mumiy Troll, led by another wide-eyed freaky-voiced eccentric: this time a young Gary Oldman with a tie around his waist. It's not nearly as good as Brainstorm's number (the verse is a bit flat), but the chiming guitar chorus is pleasant and the whole thing picks up points for being curiously normal by its quirkiness. Our winners this year were Slovenia. They gave us a woman dressed as a wasp singing a sub-standard club-anthem with some grungy synths perking it up. While the production sets it apart, it's also a little under-cooked and there's a significant hole where the umph should go. To make amends they've thrown in a "Vienna"-style instrumental section: the pianist tinkles away dramatically while the singer is carted about in a cruciform pose by two dancers. A novelty key-change with a lengthy drop-out (one of the better key-changes Eurovision has seen, and worthy of the Lisztomania that precedes it) wraps things up nicely but it's by no means a classic. Europe took a different approach and opted for the forced jollity of Estonia's entry: a post- Hot Chocolate wedding-reception number delivered by two blokes and some '80s keyboards. Your gran would probably love it (or spit, depending on your gran). It's that plastic Caribbean party spirit that stinks of cocktail umbrellas and dusty floor-wax. For each year's songs we apply our points in the 12-10-8 style of the modern contest, irrespective of how the voting functioned at the time. In brackets is the position the song came on the night:
Europe chose Estonia as their winner this year, with Denmark second, France fourth, Germany eighth, Malta ninth, Bosnia & Herzegovina 14th, the United Kingdom 15th, Portugal 17th, the Netherlands and Latvia joint-18th, Poland 20th, Ireland 21st and Iceland joint-last. |
 Slovenia's energetic performance.  Russia: "Just keep on smiling..."  Dressed in black, but unmistakably Israel.  Sweden pursue the lesbian vote.  Europe's winners: Estonia.
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